Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends. - Woody Allen
Anybody who has doubts about the ingenuity or the resourcefulness of a plumber never got a bill from one. - George Meany
Aside from velcro, time is the most mysterious substance in the universe. You can't see it or touch it, yet a plumber can charge you upwards of seventy-five dollars per hour for it, without necessarily fixing anything. - Dave Barry