What, exactly, is the Internet? Basically it is a global network exchanging digitized data in such a way that any computer, anywhere, that is equipped with a device called a modem can make a noise like a duck choking on a kazoo. - Dave Barry
We know the people with techno-fear. They're there, on the computer, going; What... oh... oh... I... I've wiped the file? Oh damn. What... I've wiped all the files?? I've wiped the internet?!? Oh no... I don't even have a modem! - Eddie Izzard