I caused my husband's heart attack. In the middle of lovemaking I took the paper bag off my head. He dropped the Polaroid and keeled over and so did the hooker. It would have taken me half an hour to untie myself and call the paramedics, but fortunately the Great Dane could dial. - Joan Rivers
Today, a successful Congressman has the fundraising ability of a hooker trying to raise cab fare home....
Ask a woman if she’s ambitious and she’ll look at you as if you just asked whether she sticks pins in puppies for fun. Ask a woman if she’s competitive and she’ll look at you as if you suggested that she’s a hooker. - Gina Barreca
How did pretty little Anna go from Westchester suburb brat to New York hooker? Now that’s a story. - Stacey Trombley
Love means never to have to say, "That hooker meant nothing to me" - Jonathan "Jack" McVoy - E.J. Eisman
No woman deserves to be disrespected; to be beaten up, to be called bitches or sluts. Assaulted or insulted. Even if she's a hooker. - Imam Shah