Fleas can be taught nearly anything a congressman can. - Mark Twain
Nothing is illegal if one hundred businessmen decide to do it. -, author, civil rights activist, US congressman, mayor, and UN ambassador (b. 1932) - Andrew Young
Already a congressman, to a mentor "I hope sometime you run across something you think I can do well 24 hours per day. - Lyndon B. Johnson
Today, a successful Congressman has the fundraising ability of a hooker trying to raise cab fare home....
The government is unresponsive to the needs of the little man. Under 5'7", it is impossible to get your congressman on the phone. - Woody Allen
[To a first-term congressman who wanted wanted excused from voting with the party to satisfy his biggest contributors:] Son, if you can't take their money, drink their whiskey, screw their women, and then vote against 'em, you don't deserve to be here.
I can name the newscaster on The Simpsons, but I can't name my own congressman. And that's what makes America great.
I don't know what's wrong with my television set. I was getting C-Span and the Home Shopping Network on the same station. I actually bought a congressman.