Of all the queer sources of romance, ours lay in the discovery that each was an addict of Boswell's Life of Johnson. H.E.G. had a first edition of the Journey to the Hebrides, which I coveted mightily. Why not acquire the book honorably, marry the man, and have it around the house? - Beatrice Fairfax
His body had almost no hair and his naked little circumcised johnson was nearly as pale as the rest of him, white as a boy's - perhaps over time one's genitals emerge from the pots and bubbling vats of love permanently stained, like the hands of a wool dyer. - Michael Chabon
Say no only when it really matters. Wear a bright red shirt with bright orange shorts? Sure. Put water in the toy tea set? Okay. Sleep with your head at the foot of the bed? Fine. Samuel Johnson said, All severity that does not tend to increase good, or prevent evil, is idle. - Gretchen Rubin
ABRUPT, adj. Sudden, without ceremony, like the arrival of a cannon- shot and the departure of the soldier whose interests are most affected by it. Dr. Samuel Johnson beautifully said of another author's ideas that they were "concatenated without abruption." - Ambrose Bierce
BRANDY, n. A cordial composed of one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody murder, one part death-hell-and-the- grave and four parts clarified Satan. Dose, a headful all the time. Brandy is said by Dr. Johnson to be the drink of heroes. Only a hero will venture to drink it. - Ambrose Bierce
During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk; today we have small men enjoying big talk. - Fred Allen
We must uphold the promise of Roosevelt, Truman, Kennedy, Johnson, Carter, and Clinton and never allow the President and his Republican friends to threaten Social Security by putting it on the Wall Street trading block. - John Kerry
RECRUIT, n. A person distinguishable from a civilian by his uniform and from a soldier by his gait. Fresh from the farm or factory or street, His marching, in pursuit or in retreat, Were an impressive martial spectacle Except for two impediments -- his feet. Thompson Johnson - Ambrose Bierce
Instead of finding himself in nerd heaven—where every nerd gets fifty-eight virgins to role-play with—he woke up in Robert Wood Johnson with two broken legs and a separated shoulder, feeling like, well, he'd jumped off the New Brunswick train bridge. - Junot Díaz
Samuel Johnson said a second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience, Kirkland said. - Mary Jo Putney
Johnson had a sense of humor, and he could kid with me, he would say. Johnson didn’t enjoy talking with most liberals. He didn’t think they had a sense of humor. - Hubert H. Humphrey