A lady came up to me on the street and pointed to my suede jacket. "You know a cow was murdered for that jacket?" she sneered. I replied in a psychotic tone, "I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too."
Keep rechewing. Like a cow. Use all your creative stomachs. - Elizabeth M. Lawrence
Who was the guy who first looked at a cow and said 'I think I’ll drink whatever comes out of these when I squeeze ’em? - Bill Watterson
The TSA must think we're mushrooms. You know, the way they are trying to keep us in the dark, and the way they keep feeding us a fertilizing agent that comes from the south end of a north-bound cow. - Douglas Wilson
ECONOMY, n. Purchasing the barrel of whiskey that you do not need for the price of the cow that you cannot afford. - Ambrose Bierce
The friendly cow all red and white, I love with all my heart: She gives me cream with all her might; to eat with apple tart. - Robert Louis Stevenson
If you can't lay an egg or milk a cow - Rebbecca D. Myers
Don't you want me to kiss you goodbye, sweetie?""Kiss a cow farm boy - Nora Roberts
Listening to the Fifth Symphony of Ralph Vaughan Williams is like staring at a cow for 45 minutes. - Aaron Copland
The truth is what we say it is...prove to me this desk is not a cow! - Ray S. Jones
I have been heartbroken once and it has affected all of my relationships from there on. But now I look at it as an occupational hazard. If you are in the meat market at some point you are gonna get mad cow disease. - Dominic Monaghan
It's a long slow process for a human to die. We kill a cow, and it is dead as soon as the meat is eaten, but a man's life dies as a commotion in a still pool dies, in little waves, spreading and growing back toward stillness. - John Steinbeck
A diligent ant is more useful than a lazy cow. - Matshona Dhliwayo
Many evolutionists today... continually promote the idea that 'Big Change = Small Change x Millions of Years'. This is logical fallacy... It is akin to saying "because a cow can jump over a fence, it it only a matter of time and practice for it to jump over the moon. - Dr. Donald Batten
Milk is very nice, especially with a drop of brandy in it, but the domestic cow is only too glad to be rid of it. A swollen udder is very uncomfortable - W. Somerset Maugham
Annie Taliaferro had that hammerhead look about her, like a breachy range cow, or a bunch-quitting steer. - Clifton Adams
Don't cry over spilt milk when you can milk another cow. - Matshona Dhliwayo
Tongue - a variety of meat, rarely served because it clearly crosses the line between a cut of beef and a piece of dead cow.
If happiness truly consisted of physical ease and freedom from care, then the happiest individual would not be either a man or a woman; it would be, I think, an American cow. - William Lyon Phelps
That sure as fuck ain't no cow - Scott Sigler
Writing like this is a little like milking a cow: the milk is so rich and delicious, and the cow is so glad you did it. - Anne Lamott