After what she's been through, there really should be crime scene tape around her heart. - John Mark Green
I put tape on the mirrors in my house so I don't accidentally walk through into another dimension. - Steven Wright
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together.... - Carl Zwanzig
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, and a dark side, and it holds the universe together. - Carl Zwanzig
Modern war has decimated many a country; but it has always spawned millions of bureaucrats. They fatten on shortages and thrive on trouble. Peace can never offer such opportunities for exercising petty tyrannies, using red tape to regiment the individual and making life generally unpleasant.
You can't make a woman love you. Not even with duct tape. - J. Richard Singleton
Mostly you love them and you cherish their milestones but occasionally you do want to tape them to a chair. That would be child abuse, DO NOT TAPE YOUR CHILDREN TO CHAIRS. If you want to tape your baby dolls to chairs, be my guest. I am fairly certain that there isn't like a Cabbage Patch CPS. - E. A. Davis
When you stick a song on a tape, you set it free. - Rob Sheffield
To me, making a tape is like writing a letter – there's a lot of erasing and rethinking and starting again, and I wanted it to be a good one. - Nick Hornby
Not all races are run on a track. And not all finish lines are marked by ticker tape. - Toni Sorenson
Tape the sound of the moon fading at dawn. Give it to your mother to listen to when she's in sorrow. - Yoko Ono
One only needs two tools in life: WD-40 to make things go, and duct tape to make them stop.
No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat and no amount of masking tape can ever totally remove his fur from your couch. - Leo Buscaglia
You asked me to be an open book. As I've already told you, I am. Anything you need to know about me can be found. Don't confuse me, a paperback, with a book on tape. - Darnell Lamont Walker
It's your living room, it's your life, go nuts. You like Home Improvement? Tape it and go over it like it's the Zapruder film. - Dennis Miller
The alarm in the morning? Well, I have an old tape of Carlo Maria Giulini conducting the Vienna Philharmonic Orchestra in a perfectly transcendent version in Shubert's seventh symphony. And I've rigged it up so that at exactly 7:30 every morning it falls from the ceiling onto my face. - Stephen Fry
Most people aren't appreciated enough, and the bravest things we do in our lives are usually known only to ourselves. No one throws ticker tape on the man who chose to be faithful to his wife, on the lawyer who didn't take the drug money - Peggy Noonan