The trouble with my wife is that she is a whore in the kitchen and a cook in the bed.
Quit worrying so much about the boards and nails of your life. Focus on the stuff that lasts. He glanced through the window toward the glowing light of the kitchen where Meg and my mom were laughing about something. - Laura Anderson Kurk
The big bad monster wasn't green and hiding under the bed, it wore tasteless floral prints, bright scarlet lipstick and sat in the kitchen smoking and saying 'bollocks' alot. - Jo Brand
To attempt to increase the wealth of any country, either by introducing or by detaining in it an unnecessary quantity of gold and silver, is as absurd as it would be to attempt to increase the good cheer of private families by obliging them to keep an unnecessary number of kitchen utensils. - Adam Smith
Feel so fucking angry; don't want to be reminded of you, But when I left my shit in your kitchen, I said goodbye to your bedroom it smelled of you - Amy Winehouse
A calendar was hung in the kitchen as if to say: Expect more of the same. - Gary Lutz
No woman gets an orgasm from shining the kitchen floor. - Betty Friedan
My mother had always taught me to write about my feelings instead of sharing really personal things with others, so I spent many evenings writing in my diary, eating everything in the kitchen and waiting for Mr. Wrong to call. - Cathy Guisewite
Kinko's is the soup kitchen for the technologically disadvantaged. - Paul Orfalea
Mother says there are locked rooms inside all women, kitchen of love, bedroom of grief, bathroom of apathy. Sometimes, the men, they come with keys, and sometimes the men, they come with hammers. - Warsan Shire
A burnt and experienced hands are more important than the vessels in the kitchen. - Nikita Dudani
Instead of being regarded as intelligent or knowledgeable, many a woman would rather be regarded as beautiful or good in the kitchen; many a man, as handsome or good in bed. - Mokokoma Mokhonoana
Woe to us if we get our satisfaction from the food in the kitchen and the TV in the den and the sex in the bedroom with an occasional tribute to the cement blocks in the basement! God wills to be displayed and known and loved and cherished and worshiped. - John Piper
Soon enough the tears came but of course nobody came down to see if she was all right, it was just the slut in the kitchen who'd ruined their lives, getting drunk of neat gin and howling for her lost lunatic offer. - Patrick McGrath
It seems like women are always in the kitchen around food and they're serving and they're giving and they're enjoying and it's part of the plentitude of life and the enrichment of life. - Kathy Bates
The little dove, in her nest, in my kitchen window, still awake, all scared, waiting for the storm to pass and we humans are sleeping peacefully, believing that our concrete houses will save us... - Nauman Khan
If all the exposure in elevators and cafés and cars and televisions and kitchen radios was put together, the average person listens to several hours of music every day ["The Music In You," Aeon, January 8, 2015]. - Elizabeth Hellmuth Margulis
I have seen my kid struggle into the kitchen in the morning with outfits that need only one accessory: an empty gin bottle. - Erma Bombeck
One can't work/by limelight.//A bowlful/right at/one's elbow//produces no/more than/a baleful/glow against/the kitchen table.//The fruit purveyor's/whole unstable/pyramid//doesn't equal/what daylight did. - Kay Ryan
We need more men to sit at the table... at the kitchen table. - Sheryl Sandberg
I was making pancakes the other day and a fly flew into the kitchen. And that's when I realized that a spatula is a lot like a fly swatter. And a crushed fly is a lot like a blueberry. And a roommate is a lot like a fly eater. - Demetri Martin
Those who are so eager for women and girls to go back to the kitchen might think again about just what it is we might be up to in there. You can plan a lot of damage from a kitchen. It’s also where the knives are kept. - Laurie Penny
My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of the bell, simmer down and go about business as usual. - Phyllis Diller
America's leaders should be examples of integrity and high moral standards. When their behavior evokes shame rather than pride and becomes something that we don't want to discuss in front of the children at the kitchen table, we should consider impeachment. - Ben Carson, M.D.
My Date was waiting for me at the kitchen door, ears perked, tail wagging and bits of wicker clinging to his nose and mouth" --Abby Shaw, Sucker Punched - Sammi Carter
When I walk into my kitchen today, I am not alone. Whether we know it or not, none of us is. We bring fathers and mothers and kitchen tables, and every meal we have ever eaten. Food is never just food. It's also a way of getting at something else: who we are, who we have been, and who we want to be. - Molly Wizenberg
A woman keeps her kitchen like her heart: Well stocked and labelled and shelved, with lots of air and light, spick and span and filled with love - Prabhukrishna M
When the first book out my sister-in-law read it and we were chatting at 5 o'clock in the afternoon and she said, "Oh my God, chapter six, sex and a murder," and her five year old wandered into the kitchen and said, "Sixty hamburgers? - Sara Sheridan
Some people tend to throw your love to the dogs when you become totally submissive to them, but when you want to get out of the heat, they pull you back into the kitchen. - Michael Bassey Johnson
Many men know the recipes of life, but only few go into the kitchen to cook it. Go make it happen! - Bernard Kelvin Clive
In the Italian kitchen, ingredients are not treated as promising but untutored elements that need to be corrected through long and intricate manipulation and refined by the ultimate polish of a sauce. - Marcella Hazan
No one who cooks, cooks alone. Even at her most solitary, a cook in the kitchen is surrounded by generations of cooks past, the advice and menus of cooks present, the wisdom of cookbook writers. - Laurie Colwin
If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen. - Harry S Truman
There are times when wisdom cannot be found in the chambers of parliament or the halls of academia but at the unpretentious setting of the kitchen table. - E.A. Bucchianeri
And I knew that in spite of all the roses and kisses and restaurant dinners a man showered on a woman before he married her, what he secretly wanted was for her to flatten out underneath his feet like Mrs. Willard's kitchen mat. - Sylvia Plath